Sometimes, memories of the past pull our happiness down. Hence, it’s important to protect ourselves from influence of the past.
This becomes very easy, by creating thoughts like:
- The past has passed, it won’t come again, it’s finished
- It was my past karmic account which is now over, hence clearing the way to my illustrious future!
- I’m a powerful soul, I have the power to chose whether to allow the past to influence me or not
- Past is called Bhoot Kaal in Hindi, hence remembering the past is like remembering ghosts!
- I’ve learnt from the past, now it’s time to move on
- The past is not in my control
- Thinking of the past spoils my present, preventing from taking advantage of golden opportunities presently available
Also, having good experiences in meditation is another powerful technique of merging unpleasant memories of the past..
Hence as is said, the past is history but the present is a gift. Thus, let’s put a full stop to the past, & create good thoughts & feelings in the present, to enjoy a most illustrious present & future!
Best of luck!
Previous Posts: Overcoming Hurry
Tomorrow 20th July is International Chess Day. Hence today, let’s take some wonderful spiritual inspirations from chess! Continue reading “Spiritual Inspirations from Chess”
The Art of Anger Management (How to control Anger)
A version of this article ‘The Art of Anger Management (How to control Anger)’ was published in ‘The World Renewal’ magazine (Dec 16 issue)
Everyone of us know the negative effects of anger, in terms of it’s impact on the:
- Mind, in terms of destroying internal peace, happiness & harmony;
- Body, causing various toxic effects and diseases;
- Relationships, where anger can lead to long lasting effects;
- Work, affecting concentration hence work efficiency.
However still, conquering anger (ie anger management) seems a big challenge.
Hence, let us attempt to understand how anger works, and how to conquer it (ie anger management!)
A) Process of Anger
The seed of anger is Irritation. If you check subtly, an outburst of anger always starts with Irritation (or multiple times irritation)
And the main reason of Irritation is trying to control something which is not in our control. Situations and people are largely beyond our control.
And why do we try to control situations and people? Because sometimes, they tend to have a negative influence on us.
B) Protection from Influence
Hence, the key to conquering anger (ie anger management) is to protect oneself from negative influence.
The main ways to remain safe from outside influence are:
1. Direction of thoughts / Introversion (Soul conscious stage)
Whatever we think about more, we become exposed to it’s influence. Hence, the more our thoughts are tuned with the inside world, the more protected we are from influence of the outside world.
Hence if we think more about:
then we are more prone to outside influence. This is the Extroversion stage.
The more we think about:
- Qualities of the soul
- The soul’s home
- The soul’s Father, the Supreme Soul
- The role or part of the soul in the world drama
then we are more protected from outside influence. This is the introversion stage, or soul conscious stage.
Hence, the more we think of the person creating negative energy, the more we become influenced, and hence we too start getting angry. Conversely, the more we are introverted & close to the self, the less influenced we are & hence stable in our original state, thus not creating the same negative energy.
Introversion can also refer to the practice of keeping attention on our thoughts.
- If you notice, as soon as we look at our thoughts, they begin to slow down. Hence, this gives us a greater degree of choice to proactively choose a response rather than give an automatic reaction. This helps us to control anger.
- When we have attention on our thoughts, as soon as the thoughts start going in a wrong direction, we can become aware of it & hence change them. This prevents the negative thoughts from continuing further & resulting in an outburst of anger.
Those who are spiritually weak become easily influenced. Hence, becoming more powerful is another technique to remain safe from influence. This is possible by a good connection with God, the Ocean of Power, the One with all powers.
Also, the more we remain in the powerful influence of God, who is the source of all attainments, automatically the influence of everything else reduces.
3. Soul conscious vision (dristhi) / attitude (vritti)
The more soul conscious our vision / attitude is, then however strong the negative energy sent by the other person may be, we are able to remain protected.
It just means constantly seeing the other person as a soul and creating associated thoughts like.
- He/She is a Pure Peaceful soul
- He/She is the child of God, hence my brother soul
- He/She has this speciality
This not only acts as a powerful shield of protection for the self, but also sends powerful positive energy to the other soul, which helps him/her to remain stable & gives him/her the power to transform.
4. Looking at others’ specialities
These days, all souls have both specialities and weaknesses. Hence, God asks us to wear the spectacles of specialities ie to look at others’ specialities rather than their weaknesses. The more we have the specialties of others in our awareness, the less influenced we are by any negative energy created by that soul.
Hence, it’s a very good practice to note down, for each soul at home or work whom we come into regular contact with, 2-3 specialities of that soul. Then, try to keep that speciality in your awareness when interacting with him. This acts as a powerful tool of protection for the self.
5. Understanding & Mercy
It’s important to understand that the person getting angry is in greater pain than the one on whom he’s getting angry. The other person can protect himself, but the one getting angry cannot escape the ill-effects of the anger being created inside him. This awareness generates mercy for the soul, which provides a natural protection for the self.
It’s also important to understand that the person getting angry is not getting angry on us, but is actually just reflecting his inner disturbed state of mind. Hence, not to take the outburst personally on oneself, but to understand the position of the person. This again creates mercy.
C) Other Techniques
While protection from influence is the key technique to conquer anger (ie anger management), there are also some more techniques which we can use to overcome other subtle aspects of anger.
1. Overcoming Control
Before giving an advice, recommendation or suggestion to anyone, just check “What if the other person doesn’t do what I say? Will I get disturbed?” If no, go ahead. Else talk with and convince yourself that the other person is also right from his perspective, and only then proceed to give the advice. In this way, one can overcome control.
2. Overcoming Guilt
While anger is generally directed at other people, guilt is a form of anger directed at oneself. Guilt generally occurs due to a mistake done by the self.
To overcome guilt, it is important to understand that the more we remain in guilt, the more soul power is drained. And it’s this power we require to transform, to ensure that the mistake made is not repeated. Hence, when in guilt, just ask yourself “Do I wish to repeat the same mistake again?” If no, I can’t afford to remain in guilt!
3. Smaller Aspects of Anger
To ensure that the old sanskar of anger doesn’t pop up again, it’s very important to be aware of the smaller aspects of anger, which are as follows:
- Showing big eyes to others is a subtle way of trying to control other people.
- Giving too much orders to others (Bossiness) is also something to protect oneself against.
- Talking in a different way with someone or not talking at all is a subtle way of punishing others; this is also an aspect of anger.
- Talking with a loud tone of voice is also a sign of anger.
Note that protecting oneself from the above three aspects corresponds to God’s elevated direction to “Speak Less, Speak Sweetly and Speak Softly” respectively!
4. Check your beliefs regarding anger
The fact remains that one of the major reasons why we create anger (or it’s smaller aspects as described above) is because we still subtly believe that “Anger is needed to get work done” or ”Anger is needed to change other people”. Hence, we need to check and change this wrong belief system once and for all.
This could be done by realising that negative energy can never be used to produce a positive solution. While in the immediate short term, it may seem that people behave, and work gets done the way we want. But this effect very quickly fades away. In fact, people not only tend to lose respect on the one who frequently gets angry, but they also start ignoring or find ways to protect themselves from the influence of this anger. Hence, anger ultimately leads to no benefit and only creates a lot of damage to the soul getting angry.
In fact, when there is love & respect, where we give priority to people over work, people will want to work for you rather than have to work for you, ultimately leading to much greater work efficiency. Because when the inner state of mind is stable & happy, the external work done automatically becomes better!
Hope you benefitted from this article ‘The Art of Anger Management (How to control Anger)’!
You might also like to read my very short post on Overcoming Hurry!
The main reason for hurry is we feel ‘I don’t have time’. While it’s true we’ve many responsibilities to fulfil today, it just means we need to do our actions fast. But, the only slight mistake we do is, we also let our thoughts run too fast.
This actually reduces efficiency, since a fast mind:
- Makes us forget things
- For example, rushing to office & then coming back for forgotten tiffin box or mobile
- Makes us commit mistakes, hence then requiring a lot of time in correction / re-checking
- Drains a lot of energy, hence exhausting us affecting all our subsequent work
On the other hand, peace enhances efficiency, since:
- Peace improves our focus / concentration, hence we do more in less time
- Peace keeps our intuition awakened, enabling better decisions
Hence, this simple realization helps us easily switch from hurry to peace!
Next Posts: Letting go of the Past
Previous Post: Overcoming Guilt
Tomorrow 17th July is World Day for International Justice. Hence today, let’s take some spiritual inspirations from judges, courts & lawyers!
Continue reading “Spiritual Inspirations from Judges, Courts & Lawyers (International Justice Day)”
17th July is World Emoji Day ie emoticons or smileys day… Hence today, let’s take some wonderful spiritual inspirations from emoji! Continue reading “Spiritual Inspirations from Emoji, Emoticons, Smiley (World Emoji Day)”
The numerous skills of Youth!
The youth is the future of the nation (& world!), having numerous skills:
- The Youth have physical strength… Since the Youth phase of the human body is most agile & efficient
- The Youth have intellectual strength… Since they’ve adequate basic knowledge and brain’s still sharp, hence can study & acquire numerous productive skills
- The Youth is a symphony of the old & new… Hence, we’ve experience of the past as well as enthusiasm for the future!
Youth are an example for children, who follow us very quickly!
Using our Skills in the right direction!
As we know… Having skills is one thing, but using it in the right direction is much more important.
And most importantly, as is the information put in, so are our thoughts hence direction in life… Hence, if the main source of information is primarily movies, TV shows, etc, the inclination is likely to be more towards external factors like show-off, physical beauty, attachment, only external success, etc… But if the main source of information is God’s direct spiritual knowledge, then we’ll also give priority to the state of mind within… Which enables us to use all our skills in the right productive manner, allowing for true holistic progress!
The word Youth contains the word You… Hence, rather than saying ‘Me First’, let’s always say ‘You First’… ie encourage others forward & let them receive facilities first!
Many have lots of expectations on Youth … Hence, let’s keep co-operating with & helping all (for the right things!), to earn lots of blessings throughout the day!
Youth love selfies… Hence, let’s always look at the self ie focus on what I should do rather than what others should do… This single practice very easily makes us progress very fast in life!
Youth are normally at the start of their career… Hence today, let’s realize that any marvel created outside is first created in the mind… Hence, since it’s the mind which does everything, let’s also focus on empowering the mind, which automatically makes all other aspects of our life very simple, easy & natural… In other words, let’s aim to keep our EQ (emotional quotient) enhanced by daily listening to spiritual knowledge & meditation!
Youth need to earn money… Hence, let’s realize that if one’s full of the jewels of spiritual wisdom within, physical wealth comes running after them… ie an elevated state of mind, & a pure clean heart full of divine virtues greatly enhances efficiency & effectiveness, intuition & innovation… Making external progress very easy & simple!
Indeed, while Youth are called hard-working… Let’s do the smart work of empowering our mind, to make all aspects of life easy!
Youth use a lot of gadgets & social media… And God also encourages using gadgets for serving others, but He recommends never making your state of mind (Sadhana) dependent on gadgets (Saadhan)… Because when we make gadgets primary & our stage secondary, we invite all it’s disadvantages in our life… But when we use gadgets as the Master, we can create miracles!
Role of Spirituality!
Many Youth are fans of celebrities… Instead, let’s become fans of the eternal celebrity God ie remain in His elevated company always… This automatically makes us a superstar too, a hero actor of this world drama!
Many Youth get entangled in relationship issues… Hence instead, let’s make God our Supreme Beloved & keep only Him in our heart… Since this keeps us full of His divine virtues & powers, hence automatically making all our other relationships also very beautiful & harmonious!
Youth normally have ageing parents… Hence, let’s always have full respect & gratitude towards our parents, & take their blessings… Since parent’s blessings makes life very easy & full of fast progress!
Many seniors desire to become a youth once again… Hence today, let’s realize the youth phase is just an aspect of the body, with the soul being beyond all physical limitations… Hence, the soul is forever youthful ie full of enthusiasm & energy!
Hence on World Youth Skills Day today, let’s consider ourselves a soul to become full of spiritual youthfulness… Then, let’s use this energy in the right direction, for empowering our mind & serving others, hence making all aspects of our life very easy & natural… Indeed, let’s use our time & thoughts as per God’s elevated directions, to make our sanskars very pure & divine, hence bringing the divine ever-pure land Satyuga once again!
Many Youth consider themselves very intelligent… Hence, let’s also understand what true intelligence means!
You might also like to read my full article on The Art of using Social Media!
The 3rd Sunday of July is Ice Cream Day. Hence today, let’s take some wonderful spiritual inspirations from Ice Cream! Continue reading “Spiritual Inspirations from Ice Cream (Ice Cream Day)”
Guilt doesn’t allow us to remain happy. Hence, it’s important to overcome guilt, which becomes very easy with the following simple understanding:
The more we remain in guilt, the more soul power gets drained. And it’s exactly this power which we need to ensure the mistake made is not repeated again.
Hence whenever in guilt, just ask yourself the question “Do I wish to repeat this mistake again?”. If no, I can’t afford to remain in guilt!
Next Post: Overcoming Hurry
Previous Post: Keeping Attention on our Thoughts